Maybe my criticisms are overblown? Maybe I shouldn’t focus on the small percentage of churches, pastors, and Christians who have something wrong. 

The truth is, I criticize because I don’t think any of us are exempt. Not that everyone is doing these things, that all churches are tainted, and all pastors have ill motive….but that no one is above failure. We are all sinful, flawed, and deeply reliant on God’s grace to remain outside of certain pitfalls. One thing I will never say, is that I am above a certain sin. I have a firm conviction that it is only “because of Christ, that I am as I am”. 

I criticize because people are told that what they can see with their own two eyes is not as it seems—or more dangerous still, that it is not even wrong. They pour poison in the fresh water and when you acknowledge the change in taste they tell you to stop whining because ‘at least your water is still clear and hasn’t totally turned brown’ or ‘no water is perfect’ or ‘why would you complain when the person down the street doesn’t have water at all?’. 

Not to mention, I deeply believe that one of the most beautiful aspects of being a true believer, that stands firm on truth, is the freedom to be humble and meek. We do not need to fear criticism but rather we ought to be like Paul proclaiming “Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief” (1 Timothy 1:15b). I do not believe that it is our “flawless image” that compels the lost toward Jesus. I think Christ is far more grieved by our hypocrisy than our sinful failings. 

I want to show you just a few ways good things can easily and quickly take a turn….how good things can be taken to extremes that fall out of biblical bounds. I want to show you that you aren’t crazy, and even if it “dresses well”, a wrong will never be a right. I want to show you how dangerous it is to pretend that these are only ever good things which have no dark underbelly when unchecked by Biblical boundaries. I hope we, as the church, can have humility and approach these things with introspection and prayer. 

1. Strong leadership

This is an important and valuable quality to find in a church. Any great movement has strong leadership. The Bible is full of stories of men leading the charge in accomplishing things for the kingdom of God.

Strong leadership creates safety, boldness, and structure that aids in overall growth for a church. 

Strong leadership can keep a church from derailing or being tossed around with the winds of culture. 

Strong leadership is God’s design for the home and the church. So, why are people so critical of pastors?

Because strong leadership takes a turn when there is no accountability. “Strength” is a weakness when it devolves into arrogance, narcissism, and insecurity. Because strength has little to do with your willingness to do something hard and more to do with why you are doing it. 

Are you eager to be aware of every little detail of your ministry in a hope to make things run smoothly with strong leadership….or are you insecure about what might be going on in those ministries without your “ok” and therefore you are micromanaging?

Are you eager to see the church grow because you desire to see the cause of Christ furthered in your area….or because you feel like you deserve a big church because of all the work you are putting in? 

Are you bold in your teaching of truth even when it flies in the face of cultural norms and pressures because you truly believe God is calling you to that work as a pastor…..or are you saying all the right things to your echo chamber in an effort to gain attention in Christian circles and get pat on the back by those you look up to? 

I think strong leadership is better illustrated through genuine vulnerability, honesty, and humility than most of what I see in the pulpit today. It is the stronger man who can admit when they mess up, need help, or fail in the sight of God. It is the stronger man who cries out to God for guidance, who surrenders their church to Christ, and who seeks to serve in the shadows more than in the limelight. 

I think meekness is far more useful to God than bravado. 

2. Welcoming community

If you’ve ever been a teen in a new youth group, you understand the importance of a welcoming community. It can absolutely be the difference between someone coming to church a second time or leaving and swearing off of God altogether. 

No one likes cliques…even those inside of them tend to tire of them (if they were honest with themselves). Cliques ought to stay in high school but sadly they don’t. A lack of maturity, insecurity, and the devil’s lies will create cliques even in the body of Christ. 

Personally, I love smaller churches. They feel more like family. They are warm, fun, and I feel like they make it easy to plug in (well, good ones do). 

However, where good takes a turn is when that intimate body becomes busy bodies and creates a backwoods small town dynamic where gossip is more entertaining than truth is grounding. 

Good takes a turn when boundaries are crossed, appropriate walls crumble, and proper balance ceases to exist…when fashion, beauty, and popularity become of more valuable than Christlike character. 

Good takes a turn when the welcome is warmer for the wealthy, beautiful, or socially elite guest than it is for the poor, awkward, or unkept “nobody” that walks into the building. 

Good takes a turn when the welcome wanes if you cease to be useful to the “business” that ought to be family. When just come as you are becomes hurry up and look like us….

Our churches ought to welcome as Christ did. We ought to pause for the child. We ought to rush to the most needy, despite their outward appearance. We ought to disregard popularity standards and cultural relevance and love with agape and phileo. 

3. Consistent teaching

Not too much to say here. The only thing I did want to point out is that consistent teaching is amazing but it can be consistent and empty. The goal ought not to be frequency but depth. 

Repetition is not necessarily the goal. Growth is. Relationship with God is. Moving from milk to meat is. 

So, if I come to three services a week only to hear the same thing I have heard since I was a ten year old in children’s church…..

I think we get the point. The gospel is important yes and we ought to be reminded of it constantly but the gospel is so much more than salvation. The gospel ought to permeate every area of our lives. This is something we will never fully achieve. Creating a ceiling at justification creates a whole lot of privates when we ought to be promoting Christians through the ranks. A war is waging….we need to grow to labor in the harvest. 

My job is not to simply attend a service to please my Master. My job is to be sanctified—to grow—that I may do my Father’s bidding for His glory.

4. Warm to children

I adore seeing a church go out of its way to accommodate children. This has only intensified as I have become a mother. 

A healthy church is one that has an abundance of new life, the sound of youth in the halls, and the joy that children bring. 

A church that welcome little ones reflects the kingdom. “…for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these” (Matthew 19:14b)

A church that welcomes children, welcomes Jesus. “Whoever receives this child in My name receives Me, and whoever receives Me receives Him who sent Me…..” (Luke 9:48) 

Maybe you’re thinking….wait, you’ve seen a church that isn’t warm toward children? Surely they’re the outlier. And you know what, you’re right. 

So where does this good thing take a turn for the worst? When we are warm and welcoming toward children but neglect to protect them. 

We welcome them and care for them in our nurseries and classes but do we protect their innocence and vulnerability? Do we care for their wellbeing holistically? 

Do we have children’s ministries that emphasize background checks, screenings for active sin issues that threaten children, or training that would guard against grooming and abuse? 

Do we have pastors and elders that care to ensure that the children’s ministries aren’t just run by anyone? Do they care if someone who has only been attending for a few months suddenly starts serving in the nursery? 

Do we have plans in place that involve law enforcement if the law is broken? Or is the pastor the only one who is told? Are the parents involved? Is there a reason why we are encouraged to keep these kinds of issue “in house”? 

We are not reflecting the heart of Christ when we neglect to protect children.

Children are no less valuable, important, or worthy than adults. They are not less than human. They are not “resilient” and therefore damage proof. 

Children are a gift. As such, we ought to protect them—in every way. 

Abuse is rampant and sadly it is abundantly present in our churches. This ought not be so. In fact, it should be the opposite. 

We cannot be complacent in this area. If we don’t advocate for change, or worse, make excuses for the current culture in our churches, we can’t be shocked when the world calls us out on it. 

5. Desire to be holy

One thing I heard plenty about growing up was “be holy as I am holy”. 

The idea behind this is good. We ought to desire to be more like Christ. We ought to be striving for godliness and eager for consistent sanctification work to be taking place in our lives. We ought to desire the fruits of the Spirit. 

But, is this actually what “holy” means? 

In Leviticus 11:44 the word “holy” is “qados” and means “sacred”. Sacred is defined as “dedicated to or set apart for the worship of a deity”. 

So there are two things this leads me to. First, we are holy because we have been redeemed. Jesus shed His blood to set us apart for His glory. We are set apart from the lost for worship of Jehovah. Second, being sacred, or set apart for worship does not equal a laundry list of “to do”s—that’s just legalism. Jesus set us free from the legalism we read about in Leviticus. It would be disrespect to return to the slave master. 

Now, will our journey toward increased sacredness (which is the journey of sanctification) look like becoming some of the things on the legalists laundry list? Yes. But, the point is whether or not it is manufactured change or Spirit transformation. One is temporary and the other is everlasting. 

I have essentially already laid this out, but where good takes a turn is when our desire to become holy as Christ is holy turns from a desire to be with Him more, to a desire to force ourselves to display the behavior we believe He desires to see. 

When the Spirit’s work turns into our job, when relationship turns into legalism, when holiness turns into the goal instead of intimacy with Christ—good has taken a turn.  

6. Eager to witness

“Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit…” (Matthew 28:19). 

The idea that christians are called to evangelism is not disputed. We understand our calling—the Great Commission. 

However, this beautiful mission takes a turn when getting someone to pray a prayer and receive Christ becomes a matter of pride or performance. 

When we are eager to knock the most doors because it gives us leadership positions in our college or our church…..

When we are eager to find another person willing to pray the prayer because it gives us a new personal best in “salvations” for the month…..

When we are “shoving Jesus down people’s throats” because we think that’s the only way to lead someone to Christ….

That’s when good takes a turn. 

Evangelism ought to be the work of the Spirit—we are simply vessels. 

Why are we trying to evangelize in ways Jesus never did.

Jesus didn’t bully anyone into the Kingdom. Why would we?

Jesus didn’t need a certain number of confessions to feel validated as the Son. Why would we?

Jesus didn’t need to impress anyone with his skills or numbers like notches in His belt. Why would we?

Jesus spoke truth, in love, to anyone who would listen. Jesus spoke truth, in love, every time the Spirit gave the prompting and the opportunity presented itself. 

There were regularly hundreds of people around Jesus during his three years of active ministry…yet He never showed signs of a need to perform for the Father. 

He did not worry He had “blood on his hands” if He didn’t preach the gospel to every single individual He ever came into contact with. 

He lived the gospel, He preached the gospel, and He shared the gospel as the Father lead Him—He was Spirit led and appointment driven. 

I hope we would be the same. 

______________________________

Again, there is no criticism that I will forever be exempt from. I do not criticize with a heart of pride considering myself above anyone who slides into these pitfalls. In fact, I have sat idly and even participated willingly in some of these points. 

However, I have learned the dangers of doing so and the tipping point from good into wrong can be difficult to notice. I praise the Lord that I have come to where I am and I pray He continues to align my heart and my eyes to His Word and the boundaries He has set for His church. 

May the bride thrive for His glory.