I struggle with fear. I think I always have. And there’s a chance I always will.

Maybe it’s my upbringing. Maybe it’s the world events of the day. Maybe it’s the technology that pervades our lives. Maybe it’s that I don’t trust God. But then again, I do.  

Some would say that my battle with anxiety is an ongoing sin issue that I have yet to see victory in. I agreed with them. The only thing is….is fear a sin? 

For many years, I believed it was. So much so that, when I felt like I was in seasons of anxiety, I felt tremendous shame. Until I starting asking hard questions. 

Did I really not trust God? Did I really think He wasn’t good? Did I really believe I could do better? Did I really want control? 

The answer to every single one of those questions was “no”! 

So if I said “no” why did I still feel fear? What if fear wasn’t the sin?

Consider David, the man after God’s own heart. David expressed fear in the Psalms “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you” (Psalm 56:3). 

David felt fear. Just as he felt a myriad of other emotions. Arguably, he was often burdened with tremendous worries in the Psalms. But, what I can learn from David is how to handle them. 

Fear is not the sin. But, where I turn with my fears makes all the difference. 

David filled the Psalms with all the times he brought his fears before the Lord. David encouraged himself in the Lord often (1 Samuel 30:6). The frequency of my struggles with fear is not a concern but rather, how am I encouraging myself?

Do I take my fear to the sugar cabinet? Do I take my fear to social media? Do I take my fear to my mom or my husband? Do I take my fear to the coffee shop?

When I ease my anxieties by the aforementioned means, I am trusting those things to be my savior. I can say I trust God, yet deny Him in these moments. Faith is an action. My actions have to align with my words. 

So, today, I practice coming into agreement with God. He is in control. He is worthy of my trust. He is good. 

I repent of all the times my words and my actions have been misaligned and I have sinned by turning to lesser things as savior. 

I will take my fears before the throne where I will find mercy and grace to help in time of need (Hebrews 4:16). 

I may take my fears to Him and in the next moment fear again. But I will go to Him, as many times as it takes, for God is my help (Psalm 46:1). 

So, do you struggle with fear? That’s ok! Take it to the Father. 

“Fearing not” isn’t always a feeling, but it is always a choice to lean into trust in a good Father.